Saturday, March 8, 2008

The water is flowing upwards


"Oh my God, I'm going to miss the train", I was screaming on the back of the bike.

"Be patient bro; we can make it on time. Relax, it’s me driving. Be cool, man!!" My younger brother was very confident.

But I wasn't. My frustration on myself kept coming out.

"Why can’t these people walk off the road? What are these foot paths made for? I don’t want to be in Kerala anymore. The whole system has to be changed. People should obey the rules; it’s for their own safety. Irresponsible creatures!!" I was burning with fury.

My brother let out a laugh on this.

"If I miss the train, I'll take a bus. Somehow, I'll reach my college", I started looking for options.

"Why couldn’t you start a bit more early? You've created your own problems, as usual. Be responsible and not be lazy. Start listening to Dad. He's seen a lot of life", he said, blowing the horn on a kid who was riding a bicycle, just in front of us.

I know you are right, brother. I'm always lazy. But, I am what I am.

"You concentrate on your driving and save your lecture for later", I said, frustrated.

He became silent for a while.

He seems to have got that I'm not happy on what he said. Or is he thinking that I'll never be a better person?

Yes, now I could see the tallest tower of the station having a huge clock on it. Its needles are still to travel quite far before the train depart.

"Get off my bike. Don’t ask me to drop you again." He said, while removing his helmet.

I just ignored him. I've heard this, a lot many times.

"You are my elder brother. I respect you a lot. But, change your attitude man. Don’t get yourselves into more troubles. And don’t forget this time, to bring the photos of your dance, when you are coming back. Have a safe journey, Big B!!!" He made me smile.

I walked towards the station with my bag in my right hand, checking my Fasttrack on my left hand. I'm well before the time.

The train was there in the platform. The pantry boys were moving around, with the heavy kettles of tea and coffee in their hands.

I got into S4; it looked cozy, dusty and dim.

"Excuse me; that’s my seat..... Thanks", I told the middle aged man who was occupying my seat.

He took his suit case and left without saying a word. I kept my bag on the top berth and settled myself in my supposed-to-be seat watching the people on the platform. I kept the compartment door open, pulled open the windows and switched on the fans.

The train started moving after some time, pushing back the scenes of platforms. The new frames consisted of small huts, people washing the clothes, kids bathing in the open air and the boys playing cricket.

It’s really boring here. Not a single girl in this compartment. I'll die, alone here. It’s been just two stations. I've got a lot to go. It’s better to go for a sleep. No; I can’t. I've never slept during the daytime in my whole life.

"Is this S4?".

I turned around hearing that question. A girl!

"Yes it is", I said.

"Thank god! I got into some other compartment. I was almost lost. Would you mind, if I close the windows? I want to have a nap; the sounds from outside wont allow me otherwise", she said and sat opposite to me.

"See, it’s really hot here. If we close the windows, we are going to die for sure", I said trying to change her mind.

"I don’t care; I'm going to shut the windows". She did so.

She took a bed sheet from her bag and covered the seat with it. She walked towards the door, closed it, came back and slept.

I couldn’t even say a word. She planned everything and executed it. I was totally ignored.

Are all the girls like her? She should have considered me too; isn’t it? Or should I've not let her shut the windows? No, I'm not supposed to behave rude to a girl. What a mess I'm into now? It was better sitting alone.

The boredom and suffocation was killing me.

What will I do now? There are billions of people in this world, but none for me to speak to. I remembered my father saying ‘It doesn’t matter how much money you have, if you are not able to buy your daily bread of it.’

I took a magazine from my bag and started going through the pages. This was the fourth time I was reading that same magazine.

Time passed by.

"What’s the time now?", she asked after a while.

"11.30am". I replied and turned my head back to the dimmed view outside through the glass windows.

"I'm really sorry that I shut the windows. I was very tired. I missed the train from my station; and had to take a taxi and got into this train from the next station. Don’t feel bad about me. This half an hour sleep made me a bit energetic", she explained wth a smile.

"It’s OK. Shall I open the shutters now?" I asked.

"Of course, yes. Go ahead". She was very polite in her words, and helped me opening them.

The fresh air rushed inside. It’s better now.

"Hi, I'm Geethu", she said and thrust her hand forward.

"I'm Lyvin, Lyvin Thomas", I replied while shaking her hand.

She's trying to make a friendship. But, she's not the girl I want to make my friend. She's unpredictable. All girls are unpredictable, but this one is strange. Its better to be away from her.

But, why should I keep quiet? She's the only person in this compartment for the time being. Someone is better than none. I decided to go ahead.

"What are your interests?", I started a topic.

"Well, I don’t have any specific interests in my life. I like small children a lot. I know that’s not the answer you were expecting. Actually, I haven’t thought about it yet. I don’t know what my interests are". She was struggling.

"No worries; it was just a casual question". I tried to make her feel free.

"Thanks" She smiled. "What are your interests?" She asked back.

"I've got a lot of interests in my life. If I see something interesting, I would try to learn more about it. Soon, I'll get interested into something else, and will go behind that. Now, I'm interested in dance", I finished with a smile.

"I had tried dancing too, years ago. But I don’t remember anything now", she said.

"Hi guys. Can we join you people?" The compartment door was forced open and three girls entered in breaking our conversation.

"Why not; please have your seats." I was so happy!

"I'm Sajitha", the shortest of the girls introduced herself.

"I'm Pramila", the leanest girl said.

"And, I'm Jimsy", said the tallest of the girls who appeared like their leader.

"I'm Lyvin, and this is my friend Geethu."

Sajitha sat besides me, and Jimsy and Pramila next to Geethu.

I took the magazine again and pretended like I'm going through it, while I was analysing the new comers.

Jimsy is not bad. She's got some extra weight, but her eyes are very beautiful. I had always loved beautiful eyes. What about the other two? Never! They are not even in my lowest range.

“Can I have some water?”, asked Sajitha.

“I don’t have; may be we can buy a bottle from the next station”, I said.

“Here it is”, said Geethu passing her water bottle to Sajitha.

I couldn't resist myself. I went for it.
“You’ve got a nice pair of ear rings. It’s big, but good looking. They’re perfect match for your face”, I told Jimsy.

"Thanks Lyvin", she replied.

“Could I borrow your magazine?”, Jimsy stretched her hands towards me.

“Why not, please have it”, I gave it to her.

She smiled and blinked one of her eyes. It came to me as a lightning.

What’s happening? Is she falling for me? Its better to get it clear.

"Jimsy, would you like to come with me to the City Restaurant, tomorrow? I will give you a call". I pretended to be nervous in my words.

"Excuse me!!" She turned her face away from me.

I proved for one more time in my life that I'm stupid.

"Pramila, look here. It’s awesome." Sajitha was inviting the other two for some scenic view through the window on the other side.

Three of them went to the other window.

"Why did you say that I'm your friend?" Geethu whispered to me when they were gone.

"No, I didn’t mean anything. I just said. That’s it. I'm sorry, if I said something wrong." I was running out of words.

She didn’t reply; instead got her eyes filled with tears. She turned towards her window.

I just said she's my friend. What’s the big deal? What on earth is happening with me? And, why would she cry for such a silly thing.

"Geethu, are you coming here?", asked Sajitha.

Geethu ignored them and continued looking far away through the window.

"Lyvin, it was a fantastic view. I've never seen such a beautiful place in my life", Sajitha explained, while three of them came back to their seats.

"Yes, spectacular.", I nodded my head.

Everything was going wrong for me. I decided to take a break.

"Excuse me; I'll be back in a moment". I went straight to the toilet.

Why did Geethu cry? She seems to be a typical character. Its better not to talk to her anymore. Why should I invite problems?

I finished my business and got out of the toilet, washed my face and headed back to my seat.

I could hear some voices from my seating area and was shocked to see what was happening there.
Sajitha was holding Geethu's neck and was forcing her to the window. I got in between them. By that time Jimsy and Pramila came to me. I pushed Sajitha towards them, and stood strong as if protecting Geethu from three monsters.

"Sajitha, Pramila, come, lets go. I don’t want to stay here any more. Come. Fast.", Jimsy shouted and walked away.

Sajitha and Pramila followed her.

"What happened?" I asked.

Geethu sat down. She took her time.

"They were making fun of you. Soon, the dialogues turned to take a foul route. I asked them to keep quiet. Then they started making comments on us. It was really bad. I lost my control. I stood up and asked them to leave at once. Sajitha got angry and caught me on my neck. And then, you came in between us". Her eyes were filled again.

"But, you should have just ignored them. You shouldn’t have run into trouble. Why did you do that?" I asked.

She didn't say anything for a while and sat there with her head bent down.

"Lyvin, you look like my brother". She said looking at me.

"What?" I couldn’t believe my ears.

"Yes, yesterday was his 1st death anniversary. It was like it all happened last week. I was so disturbed and I couldn’t sleep yesterday. That's why I missed the train this morning. I loved him so much. I was stunned today morning, when I saw you for the first time. You were in deep thought, so you might not have noticed it". She took a break.

I was totally confused. I couldnt say a word, as she continued.

"I was very pleased, when you allowed me to shut the windows. I'm damn sure, no one except you would have allowed me to do so. I knew from that very moment, you are a nice guy”. She completed.

"But”, I paused. “I was angry on you for that incident", I made things clear.

"Do you remember that my eyes got wet when I asked you about your comment that I'm your friend?. My brother was my best friend. It was like getting back everything I lost. It was like a miracle happening". She couldn't control her emotions.

I was struck with lightning. This would be the most happening day of my life. Or, are there more to come?

"Thanks Lyvin, thank you very much". Her expressions clearly gave me the feeling that she have found out something precious that she had lost a year ago.

I should change the topic and keep her cheerful. That’s the best thing, I can give her.

"You are very crazy about girls; aren’t you?" She asked with a smile, when I was about to say something.

"How can you say that?" I blushed.

"I just thought so. I don’t know if I should say this to you or not, but I will". She looked at me for my permission.

"Go ahead". I said it in style.

"You are feeling only some kind of attraction towards girls. You might not have really loved a girl yet. You have to first understand her and then be friends with her. If its real love, you will feel it at some point of time. That’s why it’s called 'falling in love'. You've got no control over it. It just happens. And, if she has the same feelings for you as well, you should proceed". She said.

I was totally taken aback. But, I decided to go further.

"Have you ever fallen in love?" I was curious.

"No, not yet". She said without any hesitation.

That was not the reply I expected from her.

"I'm getting down at the next station. Hope to see you again somewhere". She said while putting the wrinkled bed sheet back into her bag.

Another U turn? What was this all about? Someone just walked into my life, said something and is about to leave. Why is such things always happening with me?

"I'll miss you. You are a very nice guy". She completed as if she knew what I was thinking.

The train stopped.

I could only watch her alight the train and walk away to nowhere.

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